Achewood - June 30, 2005

My name appears in today's Achewood.

Sweet.

Blessed Solitude

8:45am.

Alone in the office.

Duran Duran on my iPod.

Work doesn't get any better than that.


Funny how I can't stand to be alone anywhere else but in the office. I should study that.

Or not.

828 Feet Worth of Books

Huh.

That's a lot of books.

Totally 80s

I had a dream last night I was wearing white pumps with white ankle socks.

Unwholesome Thoughts

Really.

Tom Jones should not be that sexy when he's older than my dad.

It is important to forget that when you're watching him perform, or else it's creepy.

I love him anyway.

Toothpaste for Dinner - A slide-show tour of the most addictive comic on the Web

Slate did a story about Toothpaste for Dinner.

Yay drew!

Dogblog

"Don't you want to just hug him so hard he falls over?"

Pages Ripped From Childrens' Books

Awesome.

If you talk I'll cut you.

RAP MUSIC, MY DROOGS!

Poor Phillippe.

Meh?

'Contraception objectifies women,' she said. While loose attitudes about sex have contributed to social problems, Smith said, women are 'teasing themselves if they really think they have power by (controlling) their own fertility and their femininity.'

Because we all have time to chart our cycles on a calendar. Thanks, but I'll take something I don't have to think much about outside of remembering to swallow it every day.

What Was I Supposed to Say?

It is not a blogging week.

Other People's Slides

I love other people's slides.

Even when they make me vaguely sad.

I'm an Otter!

I want one.

Slungry.

It's lunchtime. And naptime.

Detachable Penis

I woke up this morning with a bad hangover and my penis was missing again. This happens all the time; it's detachable. This comes in handy a lot of the time; I can leave it home when I thnk it's gonna get me in trouble, or I can rent it out when I don't need it. But now and then I go to a party, get drunk, and the next morning, I can't, for the life of me, remember what I did with it. First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it, so I called up the place where the party was, they hadn't seen it either. I asked them to check the medicine cabinet , 'cause for some reason, I leave it there sometimes, but not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know. I called a few people who were at the party, but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate I really don't like being without my penis for too long. It makes me feel like less of a man, and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.

After a few hours of searching the house, and calling everyone I could think of, I was starting to get very depressed, so I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast. Then as I walked down Second Avenue, toward St Mark's Place, where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street, I saw my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster oven - some guy was selling it! I had to buy it off him. He wanted 22 bucks, but I talked him down to 17. I took it home, washed it off, and put it back on. I was happy again: complete. People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached, but I don't know. Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass, I like having a detachable penis.

Three times in the last week this song has come up.

Reasons We Can't Have a Baby, Honey.

I'm going to start using these.

Not that Morgan needs convincing.

I Got a Hookah!

Direct from Saudi Arabia.

Now I have to figure out what to do with it.

Free Katie!

Only because I'm anti-Scientology.

I could care less about who she's shtupping.

The Coolest Kids in School!

Yep - that's me. And my immediate entourage, since John's recent acquisition of a House of Blues Foundation Room membership allows us access to the Foundation Room at any House of Blues in America, and other clubs around the world.

We are so cool they'll call us Cool-o.

The ultimate goal is to be there often enough that they know us by name...a lofty goal, yes, but I think we're capable.

Yeah

IMG_0619
Originally uploaded by tankengine.

My class reunion - courtesy of Toby.

Wow - Vegas pales in comparison to the St. Stephen's.

Line of the Day

From The Bleat "Not enough Wookies. And I don’t see them as the kind of guys who’d use a bowcaster, frankly; they seem more like shotgun types. You would not want to fight an army of a pissed off Wookies with shotguns. I bet they drink, too. They’re probably always drunk all the time, which is why their language seems so incoherent; for all we know they’re not saying anything at all, just yelling. Because they’re all hammered."

Vegas, Baby!

That is the high point of the day.

The low point is that Phil's mom is dying. And I feel for him.

But...VEGAS.

Reunion Update

Word on the street is that there are 18 people going.

There were 52 in our graduating class.

HA!

Who Needs a Degree?

Articles like this make me think school could just be a waste of time.

If I didn't need Masters to be a librarian.

Back to the internship.

Home Sweet Home

San Francisco was lots of fun - 5 days away from everyone and everything was just what Morgan and I needed. We walked eleventy billion miles, ate lots of good food, saw every inch of the city from beggars to Tiffany (two days to clean silver pieces? Ridiculous!), I got lots of presents - and we never have to go back.

There's nothing better than coming home.

The more places I see, the more I appreciate Los Angeles in all its imperfect glory. There are only two places I ever want to go back to - New Orleans and Vegas. And of those two, Vegas is the only one I don't want to leave when it's time to go home. Which, in my mind, means it's the only other place I could live...and the one city that's more surreal than L.A. Maybe that is the draw for the Angelenos...Vegas is the one city that is less real than ours. Of course, that's a sweeping generalization. My Vegas friends have everyday jobs (well, one of them does, at least) and live a whole life that doesn't involve the gaming/resort industry. Although I'm not sure that designing New York Pretzels and Nathan's Hot Dogs would be considered glamorous to the average Okie who visits Vegas once in his or her lifetime. Oh wait - they're the ones who eat there.

And that leads me to another point - people who come to Vegas to experience Paris, Venice, New York, or whatever else is done in scale model this week. Granted, foreign travel is expensive. I can't afford to go to Europe at will, and if I could I certainly wouldn't be blogging on a Wednesday morning while babysitting the phones that don't ring. But, I digress. I wonder how many think that the Vegas experience is authentic. Because dude, Pepe Le Pew Paris is nowhere near the real thing. It's totally missing the dog poop on the sidewalk. It makes me vaguely sad to think that people will only see the Vegas version of Italy or France or whatever. But then, it's better than nothing, right? And you can lose your life savings right there at the same time.

That said - I'm off to Vegas tomorrow to see the Moody Blues - I got out of the Kenny Chesney show on Saturday. It was a close one.

Free Haagen Dazs for me! Knowing the architect who designed them all pays off sometimes.

Watching the Clock

I'm so ready to be not here for a few days.

Oh wait, in the next week, I'm working a day and a half.

I'm such a jet-setter.

HA!

Secrets Revealed

Have a look at PostSecret - it's an interesting concept.

On the Downhill Slope

Towards WEEKEND.

I just have to make it through the next two days...which sounds easier than it may be.